


Oh my god they were detention-mates

by TheLastDemiWarriorNinjaofFireSide



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Deceit is morosexual, High School AU, Human AU, M/M, and both ree and Dee are punk, but like...only bc Remus is remus, deceit also likes hissssstory, hel yis, mentions of abuse, mentions of nsfw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-26
Updated: 2020-04-26
Packaged: 2021-03-02 07:53:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,741
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23847727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLastDemiWarriorNinjaofFireSide/pseuds/TheLastDemiWarriorNinjaofFireSide
Summary: Deceit wasn’t a bad kid, despite what others may tell you. Maybe that’s why the universe decided to give him something good for a change.(Prompt by @Sanderssides-prompts on tumblr)
Relationships: Background Logicality, Dark Creativity | Remus "The Duke" Sanders/Deceit Sanders, background prinxiety
Comments: 28
Kudos: 207





	Oh my god they were detention-mates

**Author's Note:**

> I actually wrote this a while ago (a month? two months? Three??? Time is weird), but I decided to put it on ao3 recently, so I fixed it up and here we are. I have and a mind to make more of this, but idk. Depends if I ever get the inspiration again.

Darian wasn’t a bad kid. 

_What?_ Don’t give him that look. He _wasn’t!_  
  


Okay, well, _maybe_ he got in trouble for mouthing off a little, but so what? This was America, he had the freedom of speech! That should extend to classes and teachers as well! He couldn’t help it if Mr. Hamilton decided to be grossly inaccurate about his own namesake! Why did he become a history teacher if he was just going to feed misinformation to idiotic students? Darian would just like to have Mr. Fucking “that’s another detention for you, Darian” Hamilton know that Alexander Hamilton was _obviously_ bisexual, given the letters to both his wife and his best “friend” John Laurens! He was under  _moral obligation_ to correct him, how was that so bad?

Okay, he _may_ have overdone it when he jumped on his desk and started shouting. 

But the story of how he got here didn’t matter! Darian was innocent! He shouldn’t be stuck in detention! This was _child abuse!_

Well... at least it wasn’t abusive as the “home” he had to go back to.

But that was fine! Now, because of detention, Darian would get to spend more time away from that Lady Tremaine woman he had for a stepmother and the sperm donor of a father he had! It all worked out in the end.

Detention was something Darian was used to, (okay, he could get passionate about history! What was wrong with having an interest and being better than everyone else? It wasn’t  _Darian’s_ fault.) so he came well prepared. The lady who watched detention (some twelfth grade teacher for biology) was only there for the extra bucks. _Capitalism. _She didn’t watch the kids there with any sort of vigilance. Well, at least not the kind of vigilance which meant she’d catch Darian on his phone.

“Whatcha’ doin?” A voice asked next to him.

Darian blinked at his phone, not looking up, nothing less than shocked that someone actually tried to _address_ him, and actually sound _happy_ while doing so! The _audacity!_ Hadn’t he flushed his reputations down the drain for a _reason?_ It was to avoid little meaningless conversations like _these!_

So, given the fact that this was either a trap, or this kid was a fucking _lunatic,_ Darian decided to ignore him. He’d get the hint soon enough.

But it seemed Darian had underestimated this person’s  stupidity.

“Oooh, _Plants vs. Zombies?” _ The annoying, high-pitched voice asked, “I like eating brains, myself! Never really was one for vegetables, though! Except for beetroot! Its juice looks like blood! Very on-brand for me, I’ll have you know. Onions aren’t bad either! I always have been a fan of Shrek!”

Darian looked up at the kid, jaw dropped and eyebrows drawn together in a look of pure incredulity. Okay, so this kid _was_ a fucking lunatic.

The kid—he really shouldn’t call him that, he was taller than him— had a green crop-top on, with torn up black booty shorts, fishnet gloves and leggings, and black platform boots, as if this kid wasn’t tall enough. He had on multiple rings, loads of make-up, black nail polish, and seemed to have dyed a white streak in his hair. Every single thing about his outfit was against dress code, and Darian gained a little respect for this kid. 

Still didn’t like him, though. 

The kid brightened, “Oh! So I got your attention! What’s with that fucking scar on your face? Looks like shit.” 

Oh, so it was about the _scar._ All respect lost. This kid could fuck off. He was no longer interested in his clothes or lack of regards for rules. Darian looked back down at his phone.

“Aww, man! Don’t run off! I’m bored and you’re the only one here!” The kid whined, “Don’t be a jackass!”

“You kiss your mother with that mouth?” Darian snarked before he could stop himself, looking up as he raised his eyebrow.

The kid brightened, “No, but I kissed yours last night!” He cackled, earning a ‘shhh’ from the teacher, “She told me to tell you to feed the dog when you get home!”

“That’s be a feat, seeing as she’s dead.” Darian observed, “Unless you’re into necrophilia, or you mean my stepmother, who might actually sleep with you.She cheats on my dad _all_ the time and shit. And I don’t have a dog. I _do_ have a snake, though.”

Wait, what the _fwuh_ _?_ Darian hadn’t meant to say all that. Why hadn’t he given one of his famous lies?

Remus, thankfully, didn’t mention the ‘dead mom’ thing, instead opting for giggling and waving his hand, “Pfft, as if I’d fuck a _girl! _ This here bag of flesh is one _raging_ homosexual! I’d fuck Justin Bieber before I’d fuck your _mom!”_

Ah. A little respect gained. Darian chose to ignore the comment about Justin Bieber.

Darian blinked thoughtfully, then held out his hand, “Looks like we have something in common. My name’s Darian. Darian Guile.”

The kid grinned ferally and gripped his hand tightly, “Remus Grimm, at your service! I do thirty dollars per night, forty if it’s in a car!”

Oh dear. What did Darian just get himself into?

Darian grimaced and removed his hand, “I’ll pass.”

“Pass what? Pass away? But we just met!” Remus cackled.

“No talking.” Mrs. Williams said tiredly. Remus flipped her off once she looked back down at her phone.

On the other hand, maybe Remus wasn’t so bad.

“So whatcha’ in here for, Dee?” Remus asked, as if they were prison-mates. 

“My name’s not Dee.” Darian said, unimpressed with the nickname.

“Okay, Dee!”

Darian sighed, deciding this wasn’t a battle he had the energy to win, “I corrected Mr. Hamilton on some of his ‘facts‘.”

“The history teacher?” Remus asked curiously.

“Yeah,” Darian said, lip curling in distaste, “He kept on saying shit like, ‘Hamilton and Laurens were very close, like brothers!’ That’s like me sucking your dick and calling you ‘bro’ five minutes afterwards. It’s bisexual erasure!”

“You’d suck my dick?” Remus was suddenly at attention.

Darian sighed, rubbing the bridge of his nose at Remus’s selective hearing, _This is going to be a _ long _ hour and a half,_ “I never said that—you know what? Nevermind. Why are _you_ in here?”

“I bit a kid.”

I’m sorry,  _what?_

Darian dropped his hand from his face, sitting up and staring at Remus in incredulity, “You  _what_ now?”

“I bit a kid.” Remus said simply, “His name is Logan. I _also_ knocked my brother out right before that.”

What the  _actual fuck. _

Wait a minute...

“Logan who?” Darian asked.

“Logan Berry.” Remus piped, “Why? Ya know him?”

Darian grinned wide, wider than he had in a while, “ _Know him?_ Remus, he’s my _arch nemesis._ You fucking _bit_ my _arch nemesis.”_ he leaned forward eagerly, “Oh, this is out _standing!_ Did you get him good? Did he bleed? How bad is it?”

Remus cackled, “You better  _ bet _ I got him good! I got his arm, and the nurse said it might scar!”

Darian laughed. He cackled like Remus, actually, “Oh my _god! _This might be the best day of my _life!”_

“Darian Guile!” Mrs. Williams scolded, “Shut your trap before I give you detention for tomorrow!”

Darian quieted immediately, making a face at the teacher once she looked away. He turned back to Remus, whispering excitedly, “What about Patton Hart? How’d he react?”

Remus’s ears were pink with excitement as he leaned in slightly, whispering just as excitedly, “He screamed! And Virgil hit me with his shoe after I knocked out Roman!”

Wait.  _Virgil? _

Oh  _ god. _

“Virgil? Virgil Storm?” Darian questioned, a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach.

“Yu _p!”_ Remus popped the _p_ on the word, “What about him?”

Darian groaned, “Fuck, man, he’s my _ex!_ We _dated_ for two and a half years!”

“O-oh!” Remus’s voice was high, “Well, he’s dating my brother now, so...”

“He’s dating your _brother?_ _”_ Darian all but shrieked, then he covered his face with his hands and groaned, “ _God,_ and I bet he’s a really good boyfriend, too! I’m _never_ getting Virgil back!”

“That’s alright!” Remus piped, “You got me now, no need to cry over the stupid ol’ emo! He _must_ be stupid, if he chose my _brother_ over you!”

Darian dropped his hands, “I feel like I should be mad at you for being my ex-boyfriend’s boyfriend’s brother,” he eyed Remus, noting how he tensed the a bit, “...but seeing as you knocked your brother out, I think you’re fine.”

Remus giggled, a hint of nervousness in it, “Ya gotta love that Cain instinct, amiright?”

Deceit grinned, “How have I neverseen you around before? I feel like I’d’ve at least _noticed_ you by now, seeing as you know my whole enemy group. We should’ve been friends sooner!”

“F-friends?” Remus froze, repeating the word quietly, eyes wide and face flushing. 

“Yeah?” Darian asked, a bit self-conscious, “I mean, I’m _talking_ to you, aren’t I? I usually just _ignore_ people when they address me. That’s how this works, yes?”

Remus grinned, brighter than the fucking sun, “Oh! Okay! We’re friends now, then!”

(Not that he’d ever tell, but Darian was actually pretty surprised he had said the f-word. When had he started making friends again? What was  _with_ this kid? And how in the _world_ did he make Darian suddenly _like_ him?)

“So... how often do you bite people?” Darian changed the subject.

Remus laughed, “Oh, you wouldn’t _believe_ the shit I do! In one of my old schools, I punched a kid in the mouth and his _tooth_ got stuck in my hand! It left this _wicked_ scar behind!” Remus showed him his knuckle, where Darian could see a scar about two centimeters long, “And once, when I was like, _eight,_ I got _stabbed_ on the playground! I couldn’t tell anyone because then I’d get grounded, but it was _so_ badass, you wouldn’t _believe!_ I once broke my leg from going down the slide wrong on a hot day! Oh, and _one time,_ I got a concussion from running into a moving car!”

Darian blinked at Remus, “How are you not  _dead_ yet?”

Remus cackled, “Bold of you to assume I’m the kind of person who _dies!_ God _wishes_ he could kill me!”

Darian laughed, covering his mouth with his hand as the teacher shushed then again.

He had the feeling that his school year just got a lot better.

**Author's Note:**

> Eyyy thanks for reading!! 
> 
> Oh, and side note, all those things I mentioned actually happened! One to me, two for my dad, and one to a friend. (My dad was the stabbing and punching thing, I was the broken leg, and the car was the friend)
> 
> Anyways, hope you enjoyed! What are some crazy things you’ve done? Tell me in the comments, and don’t forget to check out my other fics!


End file.
